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How Will a Gray Divorce Affect My Retirement?
In recent years, the rates of divorce for spouses over the age of 50 have increased significantly. These cases, which are often referred to as “gray divorces,” may occur for a number of reasons, including increased levels of financial independence for women, couples choosing to delay breakups until children are grown, or changes in spouses’ priorities and goals over the course of years of marriage. Older spouses who are planning to get divorced will need to consider a number of financial issues, including how their choice to end their marriage will affect their plans for retirement.
Divorce Before Retirement
Plans for retirement are an important consideration throughout a person’s career. In many cases, a person will save money in a retirement account such as a 401(k) or IRA with the expectation that they will be able to use this money to support themselves when they are no longer working. A person may also work in a pension-eligible position, and after they retire, they will be able to receive ongoing pension payments. However, a divorce when a person is nearing retirement may affect the money saved in retirement accounts or the pension benefits a person will receive, and they may need to adjust their plans for retirement accordingly.
Can I Receive Social Security Benefits Through My Ex-Spouse?
While divorce can be difficult at any age, a person who is over the age of 50 may face some unique issues when they end their marriage. If you are considering a gray divorce, financial issues are likely to be some of your key concerns. You will want to make sure you will have the resources you will need to support yourself, including after your retirement. One issue that you will want to be aware of is whether you can qualify for Social Security benefits based on the amount that your ex-spouse will be able to receive after retiring.
Social Security for Divorced Spouses
The amount a person can receive through Social Security is based on their work history. If you do not have a significant work history, or if your ex-spouse earned the majority of your family’s income during your marriage, the amount of benefits you can receive based on your own work history may be limited. However, you may be able to receive benefits based on the amount that your ex-spouse will receive upon retirement.
How Will Infidelity Affect Divorce for Spouses Over 50?
Married couples who are over the age of 50 are likely to have been together for a long period of time. After building what was expected to be a life-long relationship, raising children together, and acting as partners to help each other navigate the ups and downs of life, infidelity by one spouse can seem like an incredible betrayal. This issue may be the cause of a gray divorce, and as spouses proceed through the process of dissolving their marriage, they will want to determine the role that a spouse’s infidelity will play in the legal proceedings.
Divorce-Related Issues That May Be Affected by Infidelity
Due to the strong emotions related to infidelity and the fact that it may have been a primary reason for the breakdown of a couple’s relationship, spouses may expect that it will be an issue to be addressed during the divorce process. However, most divorce-related decisions will not focus on why a marriage is ending, but will instead address how matters will be handled as the couple dissolves their legal partnership and moves forward with their lives. Infidelity usually will only play a role in the legal process of divorce in a few specific situations:
Is Divorce Mediation a Good Option for Spouses Over the Age of 50?
There are many reasons why spouses may choose to get divorced, even after being married for many years, raising a family together, and building a life as partners. In some cases, long-held conflicts and resentments can surface after a couple’s children grow up and leave home, while in others, a couple may simply grow apart and find that they are no longer happy in their marriage. In a divorce over the age of 50, a couple may need to address many types of complex issues, and in many cases, mediation offers the best option for resolving disputes and ensuring that both spouses can move forward with their lives successfully.
Benefits of Mediation in a Gray Divorce
During a divorce, a couple will need to address a variety of legal issues as they determine how to separate their lives, their property, and their finances. Going to court to resolve these issues can take a great deal of time, and it can be very expensive, especially if a couple becomes involved in contentious disputes over issues such as the division of assets or spousal support. Mediation offers an alternative way to resolve these disputes by having the spouses work together with a neutral mediator to create a divorce settlement that they can both agree on.
Claims of Dissipation of Assets in a Gray Divorce
The term “gray divorce” has been used to describe the increasingly frequent divorce cases involving individuals in their 50s, 60s, and 70s. Older couples divorce for countless reasons. Some gray divorces are simply formalizing the end of a marriage that has been struggling for many years. Other times, an individual files for divorce after finding out that the other spouse was having an affair. Substance abuse or addiction can also devastate a marriage.
If you are divorcing and your spouse has misused, wasted, or destroyed funds or property, you may have a valid claim of “dissipation of assets.” You may be entitled to a proportionally larger share of the marital estate during the division of marital assets.
Wasting Assets Near the End of the Marriage
When a spouse misuses or squanders a substantial amount of property before property can be divided in a divorce, Illinois law offers a remedy through a dissipation of assets claim. “Dissipation” refers to using money or property that belongs to the marital estate for a purpose not benefiting the marriage while the marriage is experiencing a “breakdown.” In other words, dissipation is squandering money or property while the marriage is nearing its end.
What Are the Most Common Reasons for Divorce After the Age of 50?
People over the age of 50 make up a large percentage of the population in the United States, and this demographic is continuing to grow as Baby Boomers get older and retire. As this part of the population increases, it makes sense that the rates of divorce for people over 50 are also increasing. By understanding some of the common reasons for these “gray divorces,” spouses can be aware of issues that may indicate that their marriage is in trouble, or they may decide that divorce is the best option to ensure that they can be as happy as possible throughout the rest of their lives.
Reasons Older Couples Choose to Get Divorced
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Infidelity - Cheating can take place in any marriage, but for those who have been married for a longer amount of time, there is more opportunity for spouses to wander. This can especially be true for those who are unsatisfied with their marriage or who have experienced relationship problems. In many cases, infidelity is the “final straw” that leads couples to decide to end their marriage.
How Can Gambling Debts Affect a Divorce for Spouses Over the Age of 50?
In many cases, divorce for those who are 50 or older can lead to financial difficulties. When a couple has been together for many years or multiple decades, shifting to living separately can be a huge adjustment. While it can be difficult enough for a spouse to cover their expenses on a single income, some issues, such as gambling debts, can lead to additional financial problems. In these situations, a spouse will need to understand the role that gambling debts incurred by their former partner will play in their divorce.
Gambling Debts and Asset Dissipation
Typically, debts incurred by married spouses are considered to be marital debts, and the spouses will be jointly responsible for repaying the amounts owed. However, gambling debts may be approached differently, especially if one spouse acted without the other spouse’s knowledge when incurring these debts. In these cases, the use of marital funds for gambling purposes may be considered asset dissipation.
How Does a Late-Life Divorce Affect Spousal Support?
One of the primary concerns of those divorcing later in life is the impact the divorce could have on their finances. Often, those who have been married for more than 20 or 30 years have retired by the time they decide to get divorced. Separating decades of finances can be a stressful experience, especially when no more money is being made by one or both parties.
Spousal support (sometimes known as “alimony”) may be necessary to keep one spouse financially secure through later life when working full-time is no longer an option. This is especially true in long-term marriages where one spouse gave up his or her career prospects to care for the couple’s children and home.
Will My Divorce Affect My Relationship with My Grandchildren?
Even though Illinois is a no-fault divorce state and does not allow for causal blame in the divorce process, family members may still view one party in a divorce as “causing” the divorce to happen. In the face of hostility or bitterness during your divorce after 50, you may naturally wonder if your divorce will impact your ability to have a positive relationship with your grandchildren.
Issues with Adult Children
The most common problems that could have an impact on your relationship with your grandchildren are likely to stem from your relationship with your own child. While older divorcing couples may avoid dealing with some of the problems of having very young children in a divorce, such as custody battles or child support payments, it would be a mistake to think your divorce will not have any effect on your adult children.
Why Do So Many Women Over 50 Initiate Divorce?
According to the AARP, 66 percent of midlife or gray divorces are initiated by women. This may be surprising: women, who are often tasked with the responsibilities of holding family life together, may seem like the party we would least expect to initiate a divorce. This may seem especially true later in life, when the children are grown and the prospects of grandchildren, retirement, and more personal freedom are on the horizon.
Research has provided fascinating insights into the reasons women pursue grey divorce. Understanding why other women have filed for divorce can help someone who may be on the fence about the matter. If you recognize yourself in any of the following situations, it may be time to contact a divorce attorney.
Emotional or Psychological Abuse
Abby Rodman, a family psychotherapist who designed a survey taken by hundreds of women, admitted she herself was surprised by the fact that 53 percent of her respondents said they left due to psychological or emotional abuse.